Marital Aids: Tools For Married Couples
“The only constant thing in the world is change.” We hear that all the time, but it’s still a surprise when we witness it happen right in front of us. It’s a nice surprise seeing something change for the better. But when it goes the other way, it’s a shock that comes out of nowhere.
We can’t stop change. Marriage and relationships can become better as time pass. Similarly, a once-passionate bed can end up colder than the other side of the pillow. Again, we can’t stop change… but we can nudge it to the right direction. We only need to be willing to put in the work. And for that, marital aids can help us.
What Are Martial Aids?
We usually hear marital aids as an old-fashioned euphemism for sex toys. However, it’s more than that. Strictly speaking, marital aids are tools to help the marriage. So, marital aids are anything used to help strengthen and enhance the union between two lovers — sexual or otherwise.
Of course, sex toys are a big part of it much like sex is a big part of marriage. But we are also talking about communication, bond, leisure, and everything else that plays a role in the health of a relationship. Marital aids can also be erotica, porn, massage oils, recreational drugs, or lubricants. It’s everything you may need to address deficiencies inside your marriage.
Which Marital Aids Should I Use?
First of all, you need to re-establish trust and communication if it has strained in the past. Any skepticism, indifference, and unwillingness are obstacles that you need to breakthrough.
If you feel like it’s because your partners changed, listen up: You need to accept the person your partner changed into. We’re not telling you to put up with abuse — that’s another story. But if you feel like you don’t know your partner anymore, this is an opportunity to get to know them again.
Second, you need to evaluate what your marriage needs. Routine? Erectile dysfunction? Distance? Tension outside of bed? Like hammers are for nails and wrenches are for nuts, you need to choose the right tool for your situation.
Marital Aids That Could Be Right For You
Performance Anxiety: We did a blog post on overcoming performance anxiety… here!
Men, Hard To Orgasm: Male toys exist if you haven’t tried it before. If you can otherwise get the job done yourself in front of porn, maybe you can try to watch it on the bed with your partner. But remember, this is still an activity between the two of you. Focus on her.
Tension Out Of Bed: You might have a specific dynamic outside of bed where one dominates over the other. Reverse your roles on the bed. Bring out the whips and ropes. Show the other one who’s boss.
Communication: It’s time to go on dates again. Try and get to know each other again. Create or go to an environment where you and your partner can share new information and honest thoughts with each other. Honest thoughts do not mean harsh criticisms.